Washing Mountain

I bore myself talking about it but it will come as no surprise that washing unfortunately dominates my life.

Wally and Derek (Nicknames for the washer and dryer) are two of the hardest working appliances in the house. 365 Days a year they are on the go like me I might add….

The washing basket in our house is like Mary ¨Poppins bag its just never empty. You empty it go upstairs make a quick coffee and bang its f*****g full again. I just don’t know where it comes from. Well I do actually . Many a time Ill be sat and see one or the other girls in yet another outfit “Have you changed again Megan?” I say through clenched teeth “No Mummy of course not?” Honestly they all think I’m stupid as they are hopeless at lieing and never cover their tracks as you can count on finding the previous outfit in the washing basket.

The actual washing isnt hard its the folding, occasional ironing and putting away. I have lost valuable years of my life trying to match up disney socks to the end I just threw the whole lot away and bought all black.

I haven’t worn a shirt in years and each summer look longingly at linen but always decide its just more work.

You do feel like a hamster on a wheel that you cant get off just as you get close to the end its the weekend with activities and ,=more washing and you are back to square one. I do love the smell of clean clothes and getting into a clean bed is one of the seven wonders but I have to confess to the “SNIFF TEST” with my kids clothes if there are no obvious marks its back in drawer. Yep standards have dropped.

Every now and then I have a melt down. I explode sick of my apple watch asking me if I am working out when Im picking up dirty knickers. The family look at me like I’ve lost the plot as it isn’t pretty.

There is talk of chore charts, pocket money, all roads we’ve been down before .The girls sit at the table still tic tocing without their phones looking like they are having a mild seizure.

“The problem is……..” my husband begins “You don’t have a system in place” I imagine grabbing his hair and smashing his head against the table then give a little shake of my head to dislodge that image.

Although I promise myself if he gets an excel worksheet out I might carry out my fantasy.

So in a superior “See Debbie this is what you need to do” kind of way he gets the unsympathetic kids carrying baskets of washing putting everything in the wrong drawers. Nothing folded just stuffed it all in as quickly as they can get away with and the finale is he puts a huge load of washing in, Crams it in so there is barely room to stuff the washing tablet in. Whites, darks, colours, handwash only sheets all merrily in together on a 3hour and 28 minute wash!!!!!!!!

“See Debbie” he says with a smug smile and arms folded across his chest “I don’t know what you get to upset about…………..”

%d bloggers like this: