Wineoclockmama in luxembourg

When I was a young girl my dream was to work with animals.

I worked in a vets for my work experience and although hard I loved being close to animals.

The harsh reality of how cruel some people can be was exposed to me in those few weeks.

A owner had bought their cat in as they wanted to abort the kittens.

She suggested she was only just pregnant something the vet assured me was untrue.

Opening her and splitting the sacs full of fully formed kittens and leaving them to die was hard when you have always done nothing but love animals.

I wouldn’t say that experience changed my mind but just opened my eyes and I realised that maybe I wasn’t strong enough to deal with the realities of animal cruelty.

Animals are innocent and we have a responsibility to care for them. Especially when they give us back so much.

My career for a long time wasn’t an area I chose but seemed to chose me.

I was successful, driven and reaping the rewards of my hard work.

I was incredibly social, had a wide circle of friends at work my work was my life.

Just going with the flow and doing what was expected was easier than following a dream.

The doubting demons in my head simply wouldn’t entertain following a dream, that wasn’t practical, it wouldn’t pay the bills.

My dreams always was to have the discipline to be a successful writer. To create stories that transported the reader out of the reality of their world for a time.

To write a book that was carried around in the hope of catching a spare few minutes to devour a chapter.

To create a story that captivated the reader so they looked forward to the next chapter only to feel deflated when they read the final words The End.

As the approach of mid life gets even closer I still wander whether I will ever fulfill my purpose.

Whether there is that best seller hidden somewhere in my brain.

Whether my ability to charm people will give me that new career.

Whether my time here isn’t wasted and my new career is waiting in the wings,

I hope so x